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What Indigo Bunting Does When Tim’s Not Around April 27, 2008

Posted by indigobunting in Uncategorized.

Shhhh! When Tim’s away on one of his trips without me, I’ve been known to exhibit behavior not otherwise displayed:

Coffee crimes: This is the big one. Although I think of myself as a morning person, this isn’t actually true until after the waking-up part. So, the first morning sans Tim, I pull the drip coffeemaker from its banished spot in the mudroom. It is banished because we are French-press people. Helen will get that.

Once I have the coffeemaker safely on the counter, I go to the freezer to round up the ground coffee that has been kept for emergencies and dinner parties. (We are whole-bean people. We grind the coffee right before it goes into the French press.) This coffee is rather vieux, because it is so very rare that we use the drip coffeemaker.

Now, this might be the worst part: At the moment, one of these bags of coffee is a Godiva chocolate raspberry. We are not flavored-coffee people. We are dark-roast people. We are Italian- and French-roast people.

Admittedly, this flavored coffee, which I bought after sampling it in a Godiva store, seemed like way too much when I tried-this-at-home. So I use four parts Capitol Grounds Bob’s Senate Blend (a dark roast from our state capital, picked up from what I thought was a pile of all-whole-bean pounds and mistakenly purchased) to one part chocolate raspberry. Then I brew a pot of coffee.

This pot of coffee will last me two to three mornings, which means that the second morning, and maybe the third, all I will have to do is heat it up in the microwave. This is good for the groggy bunting.

We are not day-old coffee people. We are not heated-up coffee people.

I feel so dirty.

Sleep crimes: This is the middle-sized one. I immediately start to sleep diagonally in the queen-size bed, taking up as much room as I can. Don’t get me wrong: I adore my man, and I love sharing my bed with him. But there’s a luxuriousness to not sharing sometimes. There can be pleasure in one’s own sprawl.

Timmy watch: This is the small one, because it’s not even a crime.

It’s not so much that I go on Timmy watch while he’s away, but that the Timmy watch goes on me. I have a watch (how could I not?) that sports the South Park character Timmy and the only word that he ever says: Timmy!

“[Indigo] loves Timmy” is lasered onto the back of it. Sure, I wear this watch when Tim’s home. But sometimes I wear it more when he’s not around. This time I’ve vowed to wear it every day ’til I get him back. Unless, of course, it totally clashes with my outfit. That would be a crime of fashion.


1. Craig (Maito Sewa Yoleme) - April 27, 2008

OK, I am officially scandalized. Never would I have imagined that a dear friend of mine (one who actually has Standards, for God’s sake!) would make flavored coffee in a coffeemaker.

I am so upset that I may well have to rethink our decades-long friendship. I don’t even know you anymore.

{running out of the room, sobbing}

2. Helen - April 27, 2008

That’s it, I’m reporting you to the Coffee Crimes division. Nobody should get away with microwaving coffee.

3. indigobunting - April 27, 2008

My god. I’ve made a terrible mistake. And once you reveal secrets, there’s no taking them back…

4. Cedar Waxwing - April 27, 2008

I fully support Indigo Bunting’s prerogative of machine-brewing pre-ground coffee and microwaving it on subsequent days.

I like this post so much I may borrow the idea and reveal secrets of what I do when Dean’s not around. Not a pretty sight!

5. Bridgett - April 27, 2008

I sleep diagonally on our double bed when Mike IS in town. I’m terrible. But not even I would microwave coffee. I can’t even imagine it.

6. Mali - April 28, 2008

The horror, the horror!!

(… I can’t make coffee to save myself so really can’t criticise anyone else …)

7. bettyslocombe - April 28, 2008

Yes I was going to say at least you only sleep diagonally when he’s not there, but Bridgett was ahead of me. I microwave coffee: It’s cold, and then it’s hot, just like everything else you microwave. What’s the big deal? It’s not like she makes it in the microwave…..er, is it?

8. bettyslocombe - April 28, 2008

But I make my coffee in the Bodum first, because I am so-phi-sti-cated.

9. indigo bunting - April 29, 2008

Mrs. S: Thanks. I agree, it’s cold, then it’s hot. What is the big deal? It’s better than leaving a coffeemaker on and burning the coffee, which is completely unacceptable. And yes, under usual circumstances, I sophisticatedly use the Bodum first.

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